The Weirdest, Funniest, Most Awesome Job Titles Ever

When I was a kid,  I would dream of becoming an footballer or the person who would put the jam in donuts. Well if I saw some of these job titles i’d be like “Mum!, I want to be a Pornography Historian” or “A MILF commander”

All of these awesome job titles will have you pissing your pants, so put your adult nappies on and scroll down.

 

Alan didn’t just stop at being a writer. No. He wanted more! Much more!

wizard-and-mall-santa-weird-job-titles

 

This guy just goes on and on and on and on and on……

vp of infinite infinity weird-job-titles

 

If there’s something strange with your teenage brood, who ya gonna call?….

teen exorcist weird-job-titles

 

When you’ve qualified as a normal fisherman and you want to move up to the next level…

suspicious-fisherman-weird-job-titles

 

If you’re being sued by the aliens that live on the planet Flubzorbia in the galaxy Spomdromida, then this is the guy you need to fight for you in the Universal Court of Justice.

space-lawyer-weird-job-title

 

If you need help with knowing which colour smartie goes with what can of fizzy drink, then make sure you contact Eric.

smarties expert weird-job-titles

 

No one knows more about shredded cheese than old Dickie.

shredded cheese authrotiy weird-job-titles




This guy got thrown out of Science class for wearing a Viking helmet. He never got over it.

science-viking-weird-job-titles

 

Is that a piece of shit under his lip?

rimjob inventor

 

This guy solves table condiment problems all over the globe

ranch dressing expert

 

I think every man would be able to do his job pretty well!

pornography-historian-weird-job-titles

 

Pork rind experts are few and far between. You could say that because this guy is so specialist…he brings home the bacon. (Did you see what I did there?)

pork-rind-expert-weird-job-titles

 

This guy only does Penguins. Ask him about seals and he’s fucked!

penguinologist weird-job-titles

 

I think pretty much all of us have had this job title at one time in our lives.

namer-of-clouds-weird-job-titles

 

The best job ever! But I’m pretty sure it means something else though

 

MILF commander weird-job-titles

 

Lube Managers. Making slipping in and out a breeze.

lube-manager-weird-job-titles

 

I don’t know about you, but when I go to the cinema and buy a hotdog, I want that motherfucker to dance!

hot dog choreographer weird-job-titles

 

No wonder this guy is smiling!

head-receiver-weird-job-titles

 

This guy will never forget any aspect of his job

head-of-elephants-weird-job-titles

 

 

This dumb bitch needs to rephrase her billboard!

hairapist

 

The Fun Club president that probably has never had any fun in the bedroom other than playing with his teddies.

fun-club-president-weird-job-titles

 

An honest boss

fucker in charge weird-job-titles

 

The unofficial job of most teenagers and married men

freelance-sperm-donor

 

Yeah and they have to have big tits too!

female web designers nude wanted-weird-job-titles

 

FAP Specialist weird-job-titles

 

 

Look at the guy in the background. He’s looking on with complete envy, wishing that he had a cool job like Director Of Sandbags.

 

 

 

director-of-sandbags

 

Cool kids hang out at the local rubbish tip

cool kid weird-job-titles

 

Funny wanker!

comedian and masturbator

 

 

Bread scientists earn loads of dough!

bread scientist weird-job-titles

 

The perfect job, just behind MILF commander

chocolate beer specialist weird-job-titles

 

The big door is an affectionate term for his fat wife’s big old pussy

charge of big door weird-job-titles

 

A job not as impressive as his facial hair

cat-behavior-consultant-weird-job-titles

 

It’s not just Bride Kidnapping he’s an expert in, but also Mother of the Bride Molesting in which he has a Phd in.

bride kidnapping expert weird-job-titles

 

 

Pros of having a massive beard:
1. Respect from other Beardsmen
2. Local celebrity

Cons of having a massive beard:
1. Will never have sex with a woman under 16 stone.
2. Birds will live in there and have sex with other birds in your beard.

beardsman-weird-job-titles

 

He couldn’t just be happy at Bears.

bear-biologist-and-paperfolder-weird-job-titles

 

Job title from Arrested Development

analrapist-weird-job-titles

 

He could never remember his job. It’s always on the tip of his tongue

a cunning linguist

 

She’s been working her way up the Dip Maker ladder for the past 20 years. She started off on 1 layer, now she’s a credit to her profession and her family by reaching the grandmaster level of 6 Layers. Well done!

6 layer dip maker

 

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